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I get home and I pass out because I can't function
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The Standups

I get home and I pass outbecause I can't function

I get home and I pass out
because I can't function

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.045
I get home and I pass out because I can't function.
Duration
4 seconds
Views
18
Timestamp in Movie
00:13:51
Uploaded
Jun 30, 2025
Season
1
Episode
2
Genres
comedy
Production
Adrina Produkties BV

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Movie Summary

Comedy's freshest voices take the stage in LA for six half-hour specials packed with sly jokes, hilarious anecdotes and awkward confessions.
S01 • E05 And in college, the way that I ate, - The Standups 00:09
And in college, the way that I ate,
S01 • E03 I was like, "What are these hos asking Jesus for right now?" - The Standups 00:07
I was like, "What are these hos asking Jesus for right ...
S01 • E01 I don't... I've never ordered milk publicly in the history of my life. - The Standups 00:05
I don't... I've never ordered milk publicly in the...
S01 • E02 I was like, "Dude, what happened in the car ride home? Did I even talk?" - The Standups 00:13
I was like, "Dude, what happened in the car ride home? ...
S01 • E06 His hair is all slicked back, - The Standups 00:18
His hair is all slicked back,
S01 • E01 I've never once in my life been out and thought, - The Standups 00:08
I've never once in my life been out and thought,
S01 • E03 "Lord, let us shake our asses faster than we ever shook them before, God. - The Standups 00:05
"Lord, let us shake our asses faster than we ever shook...
S01 • E05 And he would just whisper stuff like, - The Standups 00:07
And he would just whisper stuff like,
S01 • E04 Okay, I sleep with my dog, he sleeps under the covers, and I sleep naked. - The Standups 00:05
Okay, I sleep with my dog, he sleeps under the covers, and I...
S01 • E03 Let them clap as if we were at a graduation, Lord. - The Standups 00:04
Let them clap as if we were at a graduation, Lord.
S01 • E01 I'd like to drink it out of a straw, ' something else I've never done. - The Standups 00:04
I'd like to drink it out of a straw, ' something e...
S01 • E04 And I'm not saying that to be like, "I sleep naked." - The Standups 00:11
And I'm not saying that to be like, "I sleep naked...
S01 • E02 How many bedrooms it had, - The Standups 00:11
How many bedrooms it had,
S01 • E05 And then I'd say, "Icing, cake batter, cookie dough... - The Standups 00:05
And then I'd say, "Icing, cake batter, cookie doug...
S01 • E01 Let's do all that in front of all these people I don't know." - The Standups 00:08
Let's do all that in front of all these people I don�...
S01 • E05 She tells me to slow down when I'm eating." - The Standups 00:15
She tells me to slow down when I'm eating."
S01 • E03 Don't let it rain, let it tsunami on us tonight, Lord." - The Standups 00:05
Don't let it rain, let it tsunami on us tonight, Lord.&...
S01 • E02 [audience laughs] - The Standups 00:06
[audience laughs]
S01 • E04 So I have to, to save some laundry time for me. - The Standups 00:04
So I have to, to save some laundry time for me.
S01 • E01 It was a Starbucks that's like, "We don't really do everything," - The Standups 00:17
It was a Starbucks that's like, "We don't rea...