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I'll snap this mfxcker's heart before he's locked inside for three days.
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The Standups

I'll snap this mfxcker's heartbefore he's locked inside for three days." She broke up with...

I'll snap this mfxcker's heart
before he's locked inside for three days." She broke up with me. I was just
trapped in doors with my emotions

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.962
I'll snap this mfxcker's heart before he's locked inside for three days."
00:00:06.038 --> 00:00:09.883
She broke up with me. I was just trapped in doors with my emotions.
Duration
10 seconds
Views
16
Timestamp in Movie
00:18:09
Uploaded
Jul 01, 2025
Season
1
Episode
6
Genres
comedy
Production
Adrina Produkties BV

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Movie Summary

Comedy's freshest voices take the stage in LA for six half-hour specials packed with sly jokes, hilarious anecdotes and awkward confessions.
S01 • E05 And about three months into my workout regime, - The Standups 00:23
And about three months into my workout regime,
S01 • E04 I'd be like, "Don't look down!" the whole time. - The Standups 00:04
I'd be like, "Don't look down!" the whol...
S01 • E01 Then my eyes start hurting so bad and I just want to keep them shut. - The Standups 00:04
Then my eyes start hurting so bad and I just want to keep th...
S01 • E04 He was like, "Are we crossing a shaky rope bridge? What's happening?" - The Standups 00:11
He was like, "Are we crossing a shaky rope bridge? What...
S01 • E06 I did what any man would do. I smoked a fistful of mediocre weed. - The Standups 00:05
I did what any man would do. I smoked a fistful of mediocre ...
S01 • E01 And so I'm like, "I can't get home." - The Standups 00:35
And so I'm like, "I can't get home."
S01 • E02 'No!'" - The Standups 00:06
'No!'"
S01 • E06 [audience applauds] - The Standups 00:04
[audience applauds]
S01 • E03 I heard that women know that they're going to fuck you - The Standups 00:07
I heard that women know that they're going to fuck you
S01 • E04 This is the thing. It's hard for me being single. I don't masturbate. - The Standups 00:05
This is the thing. It's hard for me being single. I don...
S01 • E02 But there were some girls at our school that liked to go out and party, - The Standups 00:06
But there were some girls at our school that liked to go out...
S01 • E06 I have never been heartbroken, stoned, alone, crying, - The Standups 00:07
I have never been heartbroken, stoned, alone, crying,
S01 • E05 You're mine." - The Standups 00:05
You're mine."
S01 • E04 And no one ever believes when I say that. I know you guys are like, "Bullshit!" - The Standups 00:08
And no one ever believes when I say that. I know you guys ar...
S01 • E02 [a few cheers] - The Standups 00:04
[a few cheers]
S01 • E05 I do... I hate to pin it on men, - The Standups 00:06
I do... I hate to pin it on men,
S01 • E06 Just walking around the house like, "Did she love you or not?" - The Standups 00:07
Just walking around the house like, "Did she love you o...
S01 • E04 So, I'll tell you that, so I'm not hiding anything up here. - The Standups 00:04
So, I'll tell you that, so I'm not hiding anything...
S01 • E06 I don't know." - The Standups 00:06
I don't know."
S01 • E02 They walk into a bar and are like, "It is fucking girls' night!" - The Standups 00:11
They walk into a bar and are like, "It is fucking girls...