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Then my eyes start hurting so bad and I just want to keep them shut
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The Standups

Then my eyes start hurting so badand I just want to keep them shut

Then my eyes start hurting so bad
and I just want to keep them shut

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.042
Then my eyes start hurting so bad and I just want to keep them shut.
Duration
4 seconds
Views
20
Timestamp in Movie
00:18:16
Uploaded
Jul 01, 2025
Season
1
Episode
1
Genres
comedy
Production
Adrina Produkties BV

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Movie Summary

Comedy's freshest voices take the stage in LA for six half-hour specials packed with sly jokes, hilarious anecdotes and awkward confessions.
S01 • E06 I did what any man would do. I smoked a fistful of mediocre weed. - The Standups 00:05
I did what any man would do. I smoked a fistful of mediocre ...
S01 • E01 And so I'm like, "I can't get home." - The Standups 00:35
And so I'm like, "I can't get home."
S01 • E02 'No!'" - The Standups 00:06
'No!'"
S01 • E06 [audience applauds] - The Standups 00:04
[audience applauds]
S01 • E03 I heard that women know that they're going to fuck you - The Standups 00:07
I heard that women know that they're going to fuck you
S01 • E06 I have never been heartbroken, stoned, alone, crying, - The Standups 00:07
I have never been heartbroken, stoned, alone, crying,
S01 • E04 This is the thing. It's hard for me being single. I don't masturbate. - The Standups 00:05
This is the thing. It's hard for me being single. I don...
S01 • E02 But there were some girls at our school that liked to go out and party, - The Standups 00:06
But there were some girls at our school that liked to go out...
S01 • E05 You're mine." - The Standups 00:05
You're mine."
S01 • E04 And no one ever believes when I say that. I know you guys are like, "Bullshit!" - The Standups 00:08
And no one ever believes when I say that. I know you guys ar...
S01 • E02 [a few cheers] - The Standups 00:04
[a few cheers]
S01 • E05 I do... I hate to pin it on men, - The Standups 00:06
I do... I hate to pin it on men,
S01 • E06 Just walking around the house like, "Did she love you or not?" - The Standups 00:07
Just walking around the house like, "Did she love you o...
S01 • E04 So, I'll tell you that, so I'm not hiding anything up here. - The Standups 00:04
So, I'll tell you that, so I'm not hiding anything...
S01 • E06 I don't know." - The Standups 00:06
I don't know."
S01 • E02 They walk into a bar and are like, "It is fucking girls' night!" - The Standups 00:11
They walk into a bar and are like, "It is fucking girls...
S01 • E05 And I ran into an old friend I hadn't seen in a while - The Standups 00:06
And I ran into an old friend I hadn't seen in a while
S01 • E04 They're like, "Do you feel like God is watching?" - The Standups 00:13
They're like, "Do you feel like God is watching?&q...
S01 • E03 We do, but let me know if we are fucking or not, you know?" - The Standups 00:09
We do, but let me know if we are fucking or not, you know?&q...
S01 • E01 Because I was afraid I would drift out into the street - The Standups 00:13
Because I was afraid I would drift out into the street