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Only two men ever looked good in sweat and sunglasses
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Theo Von: No Offense

Only two men ever looked goodin sweat and sunglasses, that's Fidel Castroand the late...

Only two men ever looked good
in sweat and sunglasses, that's Fidel Castro
and the late Macho Man Randy Savage

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.017
Only two men ever looked good in sweat and sunglasses,
00:00:04.254 --> 00:00:07.549
that's Fidel Castro and the late Macho Man Randy Savage.
Duration
9 seconds
Views
32
Timestamp in Movie
01:04:01
Uploaded
Nov 02, 2025
Genres
comedy

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Movie Summary

Known for always saying the unexpected and telling it like it is, even at the expense of offending, Louisiana comedian Theo Von returns home to film his first stand-up comedy special for Netflix at the Civic Theater in New Orleans.
So why don't you snap into a slim piece of advice and get the fuck out? - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
So why don't you snap into a slim piece of advice and g...
If you sleep with the TV on, - Theo Von: No Offense 00:07
If you sleep with the TV on,
I don't know, probably because you sleep with the TV on! - Theo Von: No Offense 00:05
I don't know, probably because you sleep with the TV on...
Asian people who are driving, no more driving. - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
Asian people who are driving, no more driving.
I know it's cliché, but the trial period has to be over, man. - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
I know it's cliché, but the trial period has to be over...
I don't Cirque du Soleil 'cause I can't Cirque du Soleil. - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
I don't Cirque du Soleil 'cause I can't Cirqu...
So park it, Asians, and invent the hoverboard I know you know how to make - Theo Von: No Offense 00:09
So park it, Asians, and invent the hoverboard I know you kno...
Thick people that's hoggin' all the wheelchairs at the airport. - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
Thick people that's hoggin' all the wheelchairs at...
And I ain't sayin' it's sistas, but I ain't sayin' it ain't. - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
And I ain't sayin' it's sistas, but I ain...
Disabled Staff Sergent So-and-So, who lost his legs in Afghanistan, - Theo Von: No Offense 00:11
Disabled Staff Sergent So-and-So, who lost his legs in Afgha...
Park it and walk if off, Loqshwanda, or get out. Okay? - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
Park it and walk if off, Loqshwanda, or get out. Okay?
Nobody likes you guys, man. Sorry to be the messenger. - Theo Von: No Offense 00:06
Nobody likes you guys, man. Sorry to be the messenger.
If you guys were offended by anything I said tonight, - Theo Von: No Offense 00:07
If you guys were offended by anything I said tonight,
I'm Theo Von, thank you guys very much for comin' out tonight. - Theo Von: No Offense 00:05
I'm Theo Von, thank you guys very much for comin' ...
[applause] - Theo Von: No Offense 00:05
[applause]