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Tim Dillon: A Real Hero

I do not look like a cop you would want in a high-pressurelaw-enforcement scenario

[audience laughing] I do not look like a cop you would want in a high-pressure
law-enforcement scenario

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.335
[audience laughing]
00:00:02.418 --> 00:00:04.212
I do not look like a cop you would want
00:00:04.295 --> 00:00:07.298
in a high-pressure law-enforcement scenario.
Duration
7 seconds
Views
30
Timestamp in Movie
00:25:13
Uploaded
Apr 30, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Tim Dillon rants about fast food, living in Texas, Disney adults and the reason no one should be called a hero.
[audience laughing] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
[audience laughing]
"Hey, what's going on?" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:29
"Hey, what's going on?"
Everyone I know and everyone you know. Let's be honest. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
Everyone I know and everyone you know. Let's be honest.
[scattered applause] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:07
[scattered applause]
I'm like, "Remember John with the black hair?" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:26
I'm like, "Remember John with the black hair?"...
[audience chuckling] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
[audience chuckling]
Everything's about what the kids are learning. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
Everything's about what the kids are learning.
"What are they learning, the kids? What are they teaching children?" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
"What are they learning, the kids? What are they teachi...
They could not have given a fuck less about what I learned ever. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
They could not have given a fuck less about what I learned e...
My father walked me to the bus stop on my first day of school. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
My father walked me to the bus stop on my first day of schoo...
I said, "What school am I going to?" He goes, "I don't know, son. Uh…" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:07
I said, "What school am I going to?" He goes, &quo...
Now these parents are stampeding fucking… - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:15
Now these parents are stampeding fucking…
Are they teaching two-year-olds about gender theory? Maybe. I don't know. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
Are they teaching two-year-olds about gender theory? Maybe. ...
There's always one school that they find in, like, San Francisco. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
There's always one school that they find in, like, San ...
[audience chuckles] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:22
[audience chuckles]
And you go, "That is a bit much." - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:13
And you go, "That is a bit much."
Florida's got a new bill. People call it the "Don't Say Gay" bill. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
Florida's got a new bill. People call it the "Don&...
One of the provisions in this bill, that they dropped, - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:18
One of the provisions in this bill, that they dropped,
[audience laughing] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:35
[audience laughing]
"Hey, Mrs. Miller." - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:10
"Hey, Mrs. Miller."