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Everybody was just glued every day, like…
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Tim Dillon: A Real Hero

Everybody was just glued every day, like… "Honey, get in here." "I know. There's no...

Everybody was just glued every day, like… "Honey, get in here." [audience laughs] "They got to Trader Joe's." [chuckles] [audience laughing] "I know. There's no parking.
Fuck it. Watch it burn." [audience laughing] "And the staff sucks.
I hope they're burning alive right now." [audience laughs] "They're using a man as a battering ram
to get into Macy's. Take a look at that." "No, it's peaceful. Relax." [audience laughing] It was fun to see the news anchors
have to keep saying "peaceful" no matter what happened behind them

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.795
Everybody was just glued every day, like…
00:00:04.963 --> 00:00:06.339
"Honey, get in here."
00:00:06.422 --> 00:00:07.507
[audience laughs]
00:00:07.059 --> 00:00:10.003
"They got to Trader Joe's." [chuckles]
00:00:10.093 --> 00:00:11.177
[audience laughing]
00:00:11.261 --> 00:00:14.305
"I know. There's no parking. Fuck it. Watch it burn."
00:00:14.389 --> 00:00:15.473
[audience laughing]
00:00:15.556 --> 00:00:18.851
"And the staff sucks. I hope they're burning alive right now."
00:00:18.935 --> 00:00:19.936
[audience laughs]
00:00:20.998 --> 00:00:24.023
"They're using a man as a battering ram to get into Macy's. Take a look at that."
00:00:24.107 --> 00:00:25.775
"No, it's peaceful. Relax."
00:00:25.858 --> 00:00:27.086
[audience laughing]
00:00:28.611 --> 00:00:31.864
It was fun to see the news anchors have to keep saying "peaceful"
00:00:31.948 --> 00:00:33.908
no matter what happened behind them.
Duration
34 seconds
Views
31
Timestamp in Movie
00:24:06
Uploaded
Apr 30, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Tim Dillon rants about fast food, living in Texas, Disney adults and the reason no one should be called a hero.
Things are burning down. They're like, "The level of peace that I feel." - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:17
Things are burning down. They're like, "The level ...
Cops were doing fucked-up shit and it was all on camera. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
Cops were doing fucked-up shit and it was all on camera.
And I have to say that because I look like a cop, - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
And I have to say that because I look like a cop,
[audience laughing] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
[audience laughing]
[audience laughing] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:07
[audience laughing]
[audience laughing] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
[audience laughing]
"Hey, what's going on?" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:29
"Hey, what's going on?"
Everyone I know and everyone you know. Let's be honest. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
Everyone I know and everyone you know. Let's be honest.
[scattered applause] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:07
[scattered applause]
I'm like, "Remember John with the black hair?" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:26
I'm like, "Remember John with the black hair?"...
[audience chuckling] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
[audience chuckling]
Everything's about what the kids are learning. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
Everything's about what the kids are learning.
"What are they learning, the kids? What are they teaching children?" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
"What are they learning, the kids? What are they teachi...
They could not have given a fuck less about what I learned ever. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
They could not have given a fuck less about what I learned e...
My father walked me to the bus stop on my first day of school. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
My father walked me to the bus stop on my first day of schoo...
I said, "What school am I going to?" He goes, "I don't know, son. Uh…" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:07
I said, "What school am I going to?" He goes, &quo...
Now these parents are stampeding fucking… - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:15
Now these parents are stampeding fucking…
Are they teaching two-year-olds about gender theory? Maybe. I don't know. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
Are they teaching two-year-olds about gender theory? Maybe. ...
There's always one school that they find in, like, San Francisco. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
There's always one school that they find in, like, San ...
[audience chuckles] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:22
[audience chuckles]