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Tim Dillon: A Real Hero

I'm like, "Remember Johnwith the black hair?" They're like, "What?"I'm like, "From...

I'm like, "Remember John
with the black hair?" They're like, "What?"
I'm like, "From biology." "He used to spit on the disabled girl." -[gasps]
-[audience laughing] "John!" "Tall. He threw her wheelchair
over the fence. John!" -[audience laughs]
-"Yes." "He's the chief of police." [audience laughing] "Right now." [audience chuckling] It's interesting, you know?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.252
I'm like, "Remember John with the black hair?"
00:00:03.836 --> 00:00:05.921
They're like, "What?" I'm like, "From biology."
00:00:06.999 --> 00:00:08.048
"He used to spit on the disabled girl."
00:00:08.132 --> 00:00:09.633
-[gasps] -[audience laughing]
00:00:09.717 --> 00:00:10.968
"John!"
00:00:11.719 --> 00:00:15.055
"Tall. He threw her wheelchair over the fence. John!"
00:00:15.139 --> 00:00:17.099
-[audience laughs] -"Yes."
00:00:17.006 --> 00:00:19.727
"He's the chief of police."
00:00:19.081 --> 00:00:21.562
[audience laughing]
00:00:21.645 --> 00:00:22.073
"Right now."
00:00:22.813 --> 00:00:23.981
[audience chuckling]
00:00:24.064 --> 00:00:25.816
It's interesting, you know?
Duration
26 seconds
Views
21
Timestamp in Movie
00:26:03
Uploaded
Apr 30, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Tim Dillon rants about fast food, living in Texas, Disney adults and the reason no one should be called a hero.
[audience chuckling] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
[audience chuckling]
Everything's about what the kids are learning. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
Everything's about what the kids are learning.
"What are they learning, the kids? What are they teaching children?" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
"What are they learning, the kids? What are they teachi...
They could not have given a fuck less about what I learned ever. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:06
They could not have given a fuck less about what I learned e...
My father walked me to the bus stop on my first day of school. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
My father walked me to the bus stop on my first day of schoo...
I said, "What school am I going to?" He goes, "I don't know, son. Uh…" - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:07
I said, "What school am I going to?" He goes, &quo...
Now these parents are stampeding fucking… - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:15
Now these parents are stampeding fucking…
Are they teaching two-year-olds about gender theory? Maybe. I don't know. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
Are they teaching two-year-olds about gender theory? Maybe. ...
There's always one school that they find in, like, San Francisco. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:05
There's always one school that they find in, like, San ...
[audience chuckles] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:22
[audience chuckles]
And you go, "That is a bit much." - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:13
And you go, "That is a bit much."
Florida's got a new bill. People call it the "Don't Say Gay" bill. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
Florida's got a new bill. People call it the "Don&...
One of the provisions in this bill, that they dropped, - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:18
One of the provisions in this bill, that they dropped,
[audience laughing] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:35
[audience laughing]
"Hey, Mrs. Miller." - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:10
"Hey, Mrs. Miller."
It also makes teachers look horrible, you know? - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
It also makes teachers look horrible, you know?
"I watched your son jerk off with his friend. I think they're gay." - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:22
"I watched your son jerk off with his friend. I think t...
They take mental-health breaks. They do. - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:04
They take mental-health breaks. They do.
They go, - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:15
They go,
[audience laughing] - Tim Dillon: A Real Hero 00:30
[audience laughing]