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The only reason I want a son is because that's the only thing
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Tom Papa: Human Mule

The only reason I want a sonis because that's the only thing ruining our good timeon the...

The only reason I want a son
is because that's the only thing ruining our good time
on the planet

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.000
The only reason I want a son is because that's the only thing
00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000
ruining our good time on the planet.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
13
Timestamp in Movie
00:51:39
Uploaded
Oct 31, 2025
Genres
comedy

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Movie Summary

Tom Papa has become a Human Mule and he’s not afraid to admit it. In this follow up to his 2013 special, Tom is at his fast paced comedic best while relating the everyman struggles of family life, falling behind to the super rich and his hilarious cure for angry young men.
The only time someone loses it and does something awful, - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
The only time someone loses it and does something awful,
I was, before I built this vagina tribe - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:07
I was, before I built this vagina tribe
I watch the play-offs, - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:09
I watch the play-offs,
Thank God you're not that happy, or I wouldn't have a job. - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
Thank God you're not that happy, or I wouldn't hav...
Life is wonderful." - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:11
Life is wonderful."
[cheers and applause] - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
[cheers and applause]
19, everything is working full bore. - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
19, everything is working full bore.
There weren't hot, middle-aged women - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
There weren't hot, middle-aged women
They're out there now in force. - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
They're out there now in force.
Go to any ladies' night in any Holiday Inn - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
Go to any ladies' night in any Holiday Inn
Push all the 50-year-old douche bags - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:07
Push all the 50-year-old douche bags
"I'm 19." - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:07
"I'm 19."
They just terrorize one guy at a time. - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
They just terrorize one guy at a time.
It's not nice, but it's better for the community as a whole. - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:07
It's not nice, but it's better for the community a...
You have to vote for the right people - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:09
You have to vote for the right people
Yeah. Well, we had three, so two to go. - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
Yeah. Well, we had three, so two to go.
And please, if I could just leave food for them once a week - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:09
And please, if I could just leave food for them once a week
All these years of engineering and walls and electricity - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:06
All these years of engineering and walls and electricity
Get out of here." - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:07
Get out of here."
My cat, looking at me, dropped its ass, - Tom Papa: Human Mule 00:10
My cat, looking at me, dropped its ass,