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Alan? - What did you do to my piano? - Nothing. I just dusted

Two and a Half Men

Alan? - What did you do to my piano?- Nothing. I just dusted. Yes, well, I'm sitting here...

Two and a Half Men • S01E04 • 2003

Alan? - What did you do to my piano?- Nothing. I just dusted. Yes, well, I'm sitting here tryingto write a jingle about a chocolate bar and my piano smells like lemons. Gee, I'm sorry, Charlie.But they don't make chocolate Pledge. Maybe I'm not making myself clear. The rest of the house can smell likeany fruit you want. But my piano needs to smell... - Piano-y.- There you go. Fine. I'll get an unscented polish. That's not going to help me now, is it? Nope. You know what? You are a child.You're a big, high-maintenance child. I am not a child. Where you going? If I can't write my chocolate song,I'm going to take a nap

Full Transcript

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Alan

00:00:03.033 --> 00:00:05.999

What did you do to my piano Nothing I just dusted

00:00:06.066 --> 00:00:10.123

Yes well I'm sitting here trying to write a jingle about a chocolate bar

00:00:10.002 --> 00:00:12.564

and my piano smells like lemons

00:00:12.008 --> 00:00:16.001

Gee I'm sorry Charlie But they don't make chocolate Pledge

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Maybe I'm not making myself clear

00:00:19.003 --> 00:00:22.562

The rest of the house can smell like any fruit you want

00:00:24.133 --> 00:00:26.565

But my piano needs to smell

00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:28.898

Piano y There you go

00:00:29.667 --> 00:00:32.155

Fine I'll get an unscented polish

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That's not going to help me now is it

00:00:36.634 --> 00:00:37.997

Nope

00:00:38.001 --> 00:00:42.157

You know what You are a child You're a big high maintenance child

00:00:42.003 --> 00:00:44.289

I am not a child

00:00:44.866 --> 00:00:46.999

Where you going

00:00:46.133 --> 00:00:49.588

If I can't write my chocolate song I'm going to take a nap

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.369

بالكاد أستطيع سماعك يا جوب أتستطيع إغلاق هذا الإنذار

00:00:05.972 --> 00:00:07.506

هل أ غلق أجل

00:00:07.054 --> 00:00:09.999

إذن أنا بالداخل معك

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وسوف أ خرجك من هناك

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هل يوجد فتح للأبواب بطريقة يدوية

00:00:12.479 --> 00:00:15.547

يوجد لكن من النوع الذي لن تستطيع الوصول إليه بدون استخدام موقد لحام

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ماذا يوجد خلف هذه الجدران

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جدران حجرية من صمم هذا المكان كان خبير ا

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انتظر قليل ا

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مرحب ا

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اعتقدت أن البريد الصوتي هو من سيرد علي

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أنا أبقى مستيقظ ا في ساعات غريبة نحن بحاجة للحديث

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Alan

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Qu'as tu fait à mon piano Rien Je l'ai nettoyé

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Oui comprends moi Je suis là à essayer d'écrire un jingle pour du chocolat

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et mon piano a une odeur d'agrumes

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Je suis désolé Mais il y a pas encore de Pchitt chocolat

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Je me suis mal fait comprendre

00:00:19.318 --> 00:00:23.001

Tout le reste de la maison peut sentir l'odeur du fruit que tu veux

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Mais mon piano doit sentir comme

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À Noël Oui c'est ça

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Bien j'achèterai un autre dépoussiérant

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Oui enfin ça ne résout pas le problème

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Non

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Tu n'es qu'un enfant qu'un gamin capricieux qui n'en fait qu'à sa tête

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Je ne suis pas un enfant

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Où tu vas

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Comme je ne peux pas écrire ma chanson je préfère aller dormir

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Алан что ты сделал с роялем

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АЛАН Ничего Стер пыль

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ЧАРЛИ Я сижу и придумываю песню про шоколад а рояль пахнет лимоном

00:00:11.344 --> 00:00:15.806

АЛАН Извини Чарли Полироль с запахом шоколада пока не выпускают

00:00:16.724 --> 00:00:22.647

ЧАРЛИ Стой я наверно плохо объяснил Весь дом может пахнуть каким угодно фруктом

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но рояль должен пахнуть

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АЛАН роялем

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ЧАРЛИ Именно

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АЛАН Хорошо Куплю полирОль без запаха

00:00:31.822 --> 00:00:34.367

ЧАРЛИ Но мне это сейчас уже не поможет

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Нет

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АЛАН Знаешь Чарли ты ребенок Большой капризный ребенок

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ЧАРЛИ Я не ребенок

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АЛАН Ты куда

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ЧАРЛИ Раз не судьба придумать песню про шоколад пойду посплю

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Alan

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Qué le hiciste a mi piano

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Nada sólo le quité el polvo

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Si pero estoy tratando de escribir una canción

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acerca de una barra de chocolate y mi piano huele a limón

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Lo siento Charlie pero todavía no inventan limpiadores con aroma a chocolate

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Quizá no estoy siendo claro

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El resto de la casa puede oler a la fruta que quieras

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pero mi piano debe oler

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Pianesco Exacto

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Bien compraré un limpiador inodoro

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Pero eso no me va ayudar ahora Verdad No

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Sabes qué Charlie Eres es un niño

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Un escuincle malcriado

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No soy un niño

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A dónde vas

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Bueno si no puedo escribir mi canción sobre el chocolate tomaré una siesta

Available in 5 languages

Duration

51 seconds

Views

28

Timestamp in Movie

00:06:21

Uploaded

Mar 09, 2026

Season

1

Episode

4

Genres

comedy, romance

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Movie Summary

A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.