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Hey, I'm watching that

Two and a Half Men

Hey, I'm watching that. What part of "no TV"didn't you understand? I'm allowed to watch...

Two and a Half Men • S01E02 • 2003

Hey, I'm watching that. What part of "no TV"didn't you understand? I'm allowed to watch TV. I mean Jake. I said, "No TV." He said, "Okay. "I said, "Go to bed. " He said, "Okay. " - What'd you want from me?- He's taking advantage of you because he knowsyou won't follow through. He obviously knows mebetter than you do. If this is gonna work outwith Jake living here part-time, you have to be an adult.You have to impose discipline. Yeah, fine, whatever.Give me back the remote. No. You're not listening to me.You need to be firm. Okay. - Go to your room.- Yes, like that. I mean it. Give me the remoteand go to your room. That's very funny. I'm serious. Get out of here,or I will kick your ass

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.559

Hey I'm watching that

00:00:02.637 --> 00:00:04.869

What part of no TV didn't you understand

00:00:04.942 --> 00:00:06.741

I'm allowed to watch TV

00:00:07.079 --> 00:00:08.308

I mean Jake

00:00:08.415 --> 00:00:11.877

I said No TV He said Okay I said Go to bed He said Okay

00:00:11.956 --> 00:00:14.723

What'd you want from me He's taking advantage of you

00:00:14.795 --> 00:00:16.457

because he knows you won't follow through

00:00:16.531 --> 00:00:18.695

He obviously knows me better than you do

00:00:19.638 --> 00:00:22.576

If this is gonna work out with Jake living here part time

00:00:22.644 --> 00:00:25.308

you have to be an adult You have to impose discipline

00:00:25.382 --> 00:00:27.545

Yeah fine whatever Give me back the remote

00:00:27.654 --> 00:00:30.181

No You're not listening to me You need to be firm

00:00:30.258 --> 00:00:31.659

Okay

00:00:32.664 --> 00:00:35.396

Go to your room Yes like that

00:00:35.077 --> 00:00:38.765

I mean it Give me the remote and go to your room

00:00:38.876 --> 00:00:40.174

That's very funny

00:00:40.913 --> 00:00:43.612

I'm serious Get out of here or I will kick your ass

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.624

هه أنا أشاهد ذالك

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أي جزء من لا تلفاز لم تفهمه

00:00:04.811 --> 00:00:07.006

أنا يسمح لي بمشاهدة التلفاز

00:00:07.362 --> 00:00:08.646

أعني جيك

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انا قلت لا تلفاز فقال حسنا

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قلت له اذهب للسرير فقال حسنا فماذا تريد مني

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تشارلي أنه يستغلك لأنه يعرف انك لن لن تفعل شي

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حسنا يبدو أنه يعرفني افضل منك

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أسمع إذا كان الأمر سينجح بعيش جيك جزء من حياته هنا

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فعليك أن تكون راشد يجب أن تظهر الأنظباط

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حسنا لابأس مهما يكن أعطني جهاز التحكم

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لا لا أنته لا تستمع إلي عليك ان تكون حازم

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حسنا أذهب لغرفتك

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اجل هكذا

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أنني اعني كلامي اعطني جهاز التحكم وأذهب لغرفتك

00:00:38.954 --> 00:00:40.492

مضحك جدا ها هااا

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انا جدي إخرج من هنا أو سأرفسك

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.559

Eh J'étais en train de regarder

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C'est ''pas'' ou ''télé'' que tu n'as pas compris

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Je peux regarder la télé quand je veux

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Pas toi Jake

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J'ai dit ''Pas de télé '' ll a dit ''Oui '' ''Va dormir '' ''Oui ''

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Que veux tu de plus ll ne fait pas ce que tu dis

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parce qu'il sait que tu laisses couler

00:00:16.531 --> 00:00:19.162

Ton fils me connaît vachement mieux que toi

00:00:19.638 --> 00:00:22.576

Si tu veux que Jake continue de vivre ici la moitié du temps

00:00:22.644 --> 00:00:25.308

tu dois être adulte et imposer la discipline

00:00:25.382 --> 00:00:27.058

Comme tu veux Donne moi la télécommande

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Non Tu n'as rien écouté Tu dois être plus ferme

00:00:30.258 --> 00:00:31.659

D'accord

00:00:32.664 --> 00:00:35.396

Va dans ta chambre Oui c'est mieux

00:00:35.077 --> 00:00:38.799

Tu entends Donne moi la télécommande et va dans ta chambre

00:00:38.876 --> 00:00:40.276

C'est très drôle

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Je plaisante pas Dégage avant que je t'en mette une

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Hey ich will fernsehen

00:00:02.586 --> 00:00:04.758

Hast du nicht kapiert Fernsehverbot

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Aber ich hab kein Fernsehverbot

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Ich meine Jake

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Ich sagte kein Fernsehen er sagte ok Ich sagte geh ins Bett Er sagte ok

00:00:12.105 --> 00:00:14.061

Was willst du von mir Er weiß du bist inkonsequent

00:00:14.778 --> 00:00:16.363

und das nutzt er aus

00:00:16.053 --> 00:00:19.369

Dann weiß er offenbar noch mehr über mich als du

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Wenn es klappen soll dass Jake eine Zeitlang hier wohnt

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dann musst du erwachsen sein Und Disziplin beweisen

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Und wenn schon Gib die Fernbedienung wieder her

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Nein du verstehst nicht du musst hart sein

00:00:30.266 --> 00:00:31.644

Ok

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Geh in dein Zimmer Ja genau so

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Ernst Im Ernst gib mir die Fernbedienung und geh in dein Zimmer

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Sehr komisch

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Ich meine es ernst verschwinde oder ich knall dir eine

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.085

ЧАРЛИ Значит он знает меня лучше чем ты

00:00:02.085 --> 00:00:08.002

АЛАН Чтобы Джейк мог здесь жить ты должен вести себя как взрослый

00:00:08.002 --> 00:00:09.008

и поддерживать дисциплину

00:00:09.008 --> 00:00:11.096

ЧАРЛИ Ладно как скажешь Отдай мне пульт

00:00:11.096 --> 00:00:14.006

АЛАН Ты меня не слушаешь Ты должен быть твердым

00:00:14.006 --> 00:00:16.012

ЧАРЛИ Хорошо

00:00:16.012 --> 00:00:17.068

Иди в свою комнату

00:00:17.068 --> 00:00:19.004

АЛАН Да вот так

00:00:19.044 --> 00:00:20.048

ЧАРЛИ Я серьёзно

00:00:20.048 --> 00:00:22.032

Верни мне пульт и иди в свою комнату

00:00:22.032 --> 00:00:23.008

АЛАН Очень смешно

00:00:23.008 --> 00:00:27.044

ЧАРЛИ Я не шучу Пошел вон или я тебе морду набью

00:00:36.998 --> 00:00:37.096

Черт

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.546

Eh Estoy viendo eso

00:00:02.629 --> 00:00:04.842

Qué parte de nada de tele no entendiste

00:00:04.925 --> 00:00:06.929

Tengo permiso para ver la tele

00:00:07.054 --> 00:00:08.306

Quiero decir Jake

00:00:08.039 --> 00:00:11.856

Dije Nada de tele Y él Vale Dije A la cama Y él Vale

00:00:11.939 --> 00:00:14.695

Qué quieres de mí Se está aprovechando de ti

00:00:14.778 --> 00:00:16.447

porque sabe que no le seguirás

00:00:16.532 --> 00:00:18.703

Desde luego me conoce mejor que tú

00:00:19.621 --> 00:00:22.544

Si Jake tiene que vivir aquí la mitad del tiempo

00:00:22.627 --> 00:00:25.298

debes ser adulto Tienes que imponer disciplina

00:00:25.382 --> 00:00:27.554

Bueno vale lo que sea Devuélveme el mando

00:00:27.637 --> 00:00:30.183

No No me estás escuchando Tienes que ser estricto

00:00:30.267 --> 00:00:31.645

Vale

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Ve a tu habitación Sí así

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Lo digo de veras Dame el mando y ve a tu habitación

00:00:38.868 --> 00:00:40.037

Eso es muy gracioso

00:00:40.913 --> 00:00:43.627

Hablo en serio Lárgate o te calentaré el culo

Available in 6 languages

Duration

45 seconds

Views

14

Timestamp in Movie

00:05:43

Uploaded

Mar 09, 2026

Season

1

Episode

2

Genres

comedy, romance

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Movie Summary

A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.