"Wedding Crashers" quotes

Wedding Crashers poster
John Beckwith and Jeremy Grey, a pair of committed womanizers who sneak into weddings to take advantage of the romantic tinge in the air, find themselves at odds with one another when John m... Read all

Director: David Dobkin
Writer: Steve Faber, Bob Fisher
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy, romance
Year: 2005
MetaScore: 64/100
ImdbRating: 7.0
BoxOffice: $209,273,411
Released: 15 Jul 2005
Awards: 11 wins & 11 nominations

149 Clips

Mom make you feel her tits - Wedding Crashers 01:10
Mom make you feel her tits
Why don't you tell her - Wedding Crashers 01:45
Why don't you tell her
And do ya maybe feel the same way - Wedding Crashers 01:08
And do ya maybe feel the same way
You gotta treat cake like a lady - Wedding Crashers 00:20
You gotta treat cake like a lady
Pick up your fucking skateboard - Wedding Crashers 00:07
Pick up your fucking skateboard
I'm going downtown - Wedding Crashers 00:49
I'm going downtown
I can't be around her - Wedding Crashers 00:31
I can't be around her
I don't give a baker's fuck - Wedding Crashers 00:15
I don't give a baker's fuck
Grab that net and catch that beautiful butterfly - Wedding Crashers 00:17
Grab that net and catch that beautiful butterfly
I can't breathe - Wedding Crashers 00:35
I can't breathe
You were awesome - Wedding Crashers 00:37
You were awesome
Grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac - Wedding Crashers 00:20
Grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac
Sanjay Collins - Wedding Crashers 00:21
Sanjay Collins
Watch me take this on down the road - Wedding Crashers 00:18
Watch me take this on down the road
I think he's on steroids - Wedding Crashers 00:24
I think he's on steroids
But you know what - Wedding Crashers 00:31
But you know what
She's fit for a strait jacket - Wedding Crashers 00:29
She's fit for a strait jacket
You and I both know I'm a phenomenal dancer - Wedding Crashers 00:19
You and I both know I'm a phenomenal dancer
Phenomenal finger food - Wedding Crashers 00:15
Phenomenal finger food
I feel so tiny in your arms - Wedding Crashers 00:19
I feel so tiny in your arms
I'm not gonna apologize - Wedding Crashers 00:14
I'm not gonna apologize
Please don't take a turn to negative town - Wedding Crashers 00:19
Please don't take a turn to negative town
You're an idiot - Wedding Crashers 00:14
You're an idiot
That was amazing - Wedding Crashers 00:50
That was amazing
You know she is not just another notch on the old belt - Wedding Crashers 00:35
You know she is not just another notch on the old belt
Throw an interception to Claire - Wedding Crashers 00:50
Throw an interception to Claire
I'm pretty sure that is  not  what I've been saying to you - Wedding Crashers 00:24
I'm pretty sure that is not what I've been saying to you
Why don't you just feed me to the lions - Wedding Crashers 01:51
Why don't you just feed me to the lions
I don't mean to pry - Wedding Crashers 00:08
I don't mean to pry
I always knew I was never going to be a professional bull fighter - Wedding Crashers 00:29
I always knew I was never going to be a professional bull...
There's something not right about these guys - Wedding Crashers 00:41
There's something not right about these guys
What do you mean - Wedding Crashers 00:41
What do you mean
Are you not getting enough attention - Wedding Crashers 00:17
Are you not getting enough attention
You're not that young - Wedding Crashers 00:06
You're not that young
CAN WE GET SOME MEATLOAF - Wedding Crashers 00:22
CAN WE GET SOME MEATLOAF
I'm not perfect - Wedding Crashers 00:21
I'm not perfect
We did not have a moment at the dinner table - Wedding Crashers 00:28
We did not have a moment at the dinner table
So damn beautiful - Wedding Crashers 00:27
So damn beautiful
We should get back to the bar - Wedding Crashers 00:32
We should get back to the bar
It was terrific - Wedding Crashers 00:13
It was terrific
It's a  Yes  or  No  question - Wedding Crashers 00:39
It's a Yes or No question
What did you do - Wedding Crashers 00:55
What did you do
She tried to poison his oatmeal - Wedding Crashers 00:29
She tried to poison his oatmeal
Her boyfriend just died - Wedding Crashers 00:32
Her boyfriend just died
We're a folk singing group from Salt Lake City - Wedding Crashers 00:10
We're a folk singing group from Salt Lake City
I made you a painting - Wedding Crashers 00:28
I made you a painting
I'm not even gunna say it - Wedding Crashers 00:31
I'm not even gunna say it
And then when she comes close to check it out - Wedding Crashers 01:03
And then when she comes close to check it out
Share that with the Dalai Lama - Wedding Crashers 00:13
Share that with the Dalai Lama
I've been doing a lot of soul searching recently - Wedding Crashers 01:14
I've been doing a lot of soul searching recently
I think we've got a crier - Wedding Crashers 00:11
I think we've got a crier
My best friend and my first mate - Wedding Crashers 00:50
My best friend and my first mate
After my ninth stint in rehab - Wedding Crashers 00:29
After my ninth stint in rehab
What are you going to do for an encore - Wedding Crashers 00:20
What are you going to do for an encore
I'm just swinging the jib for your dad - Wedding Crashers 00:49
I'm just swinging the jib for your dad
He's down again - Wedding Crashers 00:19
He's down again
What's going on - Wedding Crashers 02:18
What's going on
Oh Jesus Christ - Wedding Crashers 01:21
Oh Jesus Christ
He's the best man - Wedding Crashers 00:12
He's the best man
That's Luigi and Gina's son Christopher - Wedding Crashers 00:18
That's Luigi and Gina's son Christopher
It wouldn't kill you to play some competitive sports - Wedding Crashers 00:30
It wouldn't kill you to play some competitive sports
Bunch those panties up into a little ball - Wedding Crashers 00:39
Bunch those panties up into a little ball
Actually Todd is an amazing painter - Wedding Crashers 01:15
Actually Todd is an amazing painter
Congratulations - Wedding Crashers 01:22
Congratulations
What the fuck do you want - Wedding Crashers 00:16
What the fuck do you want
I saw you at the wedding - Wedding Crashers 00:37
I saw you at the wedding
How long have you and the Secretary been married - Wedding Crashers 00:36
How long have you and the Secretary been married
That's beautiful - Wedding Crashers 00:35
That's beautiful
I got a stage five clinger - Wedding Crashers 00:17
I got a stage five clinger
My father warned me about people like you Jeremy - Wedding Crashers 02:15
My father warned me about people like you Jeremy
What are you talking about - Wedding Crashers 02:16
What are you talking about
You can't marry this guy - Wedding Crashers 00:21
You can't marry this guy
I don't like the feeling - Wedding Crashers 02:02
I don't like the feeling
It's hot out here - Wedding Crashers 00:21
It's hot out here
I almost numchucked you - Wedding Crashers 00:19
I almost numchucked you
We're brothers from New Hampshire - Wedding Crashers 01:42
We're brothers from New Hampshire
What's our back story - Wedding Crashers 01:43
What's our back story
I was just having a bad dream - Wedding Crashers 00:20
I was just having a bad dream
Never walk away from a crasher in a funny jacket - Wedding Crashers 00:13
Never walk away from a crasher in a funny jacket
I'm just warming up - Wedding Crashers 00:18
I'm just warming up
What are you going to say - Wedding Crashers 02:45
What are you going to say
I'm getting married - Wedding Crashers 00:47
I'm getting married
My head's buried in a toilet - Wedding Crashers 01:04
My head's buried in a toilet
What do you think - Wedding Crashers 01:01
What do you think
Let's play tummy sticks - Wedding Crashers 00:16
Let's play tummy sticks
The guy wants to run for president - Wedding Crashers 00:26
The guy wants to run for president
A real rug muncher - Wedding Crashers 00:23
A real rug muncher
What is true love - Wedding Crashers 00:39
What is true love
Two of the great American families - Wedding Crashers 00:48
Two of the great American families
Would you say you're completely full of shit or just 50 - Wedding Crashers 00:11
Would you say you're completely full of shit or just 50
Shirts and Pants - Wedding Crashers 00:32
Shirts and Pants
Are you kidding me - Wedding Crashers 01:48
Are you kidding me
Secretary Cleary - Wedding Crashers 01:54
Secretary Cleary
Tattoo on the lower back - Wedding Crashers 00:22
Tattoo on the lower back
A friend in need is a pest - Wedding Crashers 00:17
A friend in need is a pest
She took me below deck for forty five minutes - Wedding Crashers 00:26
She took me below deck for forty five minutes
We can forget about mom for a while - Wedding Crashers 00:33
We can forget about mom for a while
I'm gonna go see Dr - Wedding Crashers 00:34
I'm gonna go see Dr
You get your fucking ass on that altar right now - Wedding Crashers 00:26
You get your fucking ass on that altar right now
I just want a bicycle - Wedding Crashers 01:13
I just want a bicycle
Have you even shot one of these things before - Wedding Crashers 02:28
Have you even shot one of these things before
So is it just about the money - Wedding Crashers 02:16
So is it just about the money
You are my bitch lover - Wedding Crashers 00:19
You are my bitch lover
French Foreign Legion - Wedding Crashers 01:02
French Foreign Legion
Do you know what that awareness is - Wedding Crashers 01:17
Do you know what that awareness is
You wanna know what the kicker is - Wedding Crashers 01:27
You wanna know what the kicker is
You better lock it up - Wedding Crashers 00:14
You better lock it up
Does anyone know what this here is used for - Wedding Crashers 00:27
Does anyone know what this here is used for
I'm sorry I called you white trash - Wedding Crashers 00:41
I'm sorry I called you white trash
Love doesn't exist - Wedding Crashers 00:38
Love doesn't exist
Crabcakes and Football - Wedding Crashers 00:19
Crabcakes and Football
I've got the perfect girl for you - Wedding Crashers 04:08
I've got the perfect girl for you
You banging the daughter and the grandma - Wedding Crashers 00:59
You banging the daughter and the grandma
I can't marry you - Wedding Crashers 01:05
I can't marry you
What are you doing - Wedding Crashers 00:28
What are you doing
True love is the soul's recognition of its counterpoint in another - Wedding Crashers 00:24
True love is the soul's recognition of its counterpoint in...
Is getting married - Wedding Crashers 00:25
Is getting married
Jeremy tried to seduce me - Wedding Crashers 00:26
Jeremy tried to seduce me
I just had my tits done - Wedding Crashers 01:25
I just had my tits done
You selfish son of a bitch - Wedding Crashers 00:40
You selfish son of a bitch
Will you wait just a second - Wedding Crashers 04:26
Will you wait just a second
Claire's mom just made me grab her hooters - Wedding Crashers 02:38
Claire's mom just made me grab her hooters
How many times you gonna do this shit - Wedding Crashers 00:40
How many times you gonna do this shit
Environmental is also a hunter - Wedding Crashers 01:09
Environmental is also a hunter
I notice you haven't even touched your food yet - Wedding Crashers 00:25
I notice you haven't even touched your food yet
Don't waste your time on girls with hats - Wedding Crashers 00:51
Don't waste your time on girls with hats
I didn't get a lot of sleep last night - Wedding Crashers 00:49
I didn't get a lot of sleep last night
You know how they say we only use 10 percent of our brains - Wedding Crashers 00:27
You know how they say we only use 10 percent of our brains
Is the institution of marriage - Wedding Crashers 00:17
Is the institution of marriage
I think that's Sid's kid Leonard - Wedding Crashers 00:14
I think that's Sid's kid Leonard
I felt like Jodie Foster in  The Accused  last night - Wedding Crashers 00:18
I felt like Jodie Foster in The Accused last night
I don't have custody of the kids - Wedding Crashers 00:43
I don't have custody of the kids
You're  gonna cover me - Wedding Crashers 00:47
You're gonna cover me
You shut your mouth when you're talking to me - Wedding Crashers 00:16
You shut your mouth when you're talking to me
He can have the miles - Wedding Crashers 00:15
He can have the miles
Go comatose for me - Wedding Crashers 00:11
Go comatose for me
Double or nothing - Wedding Crashers 00:44
Double or nothing
Don't you think that's really soon - Wedding Crashers 00:42
Don't you think that's really soon
And you wanna know what - Wedding Crashers 00:37
And you wanna know what
What is hot route - Wedding Crashers 00:27
What is hot route
That's Mai Lin's adopted son Manni - Wedding Crashers 00:17
That's Mai Lin's adopted son Manni
That glass looks half full to me - Wedding Crashers 00:27
That glass looks half full to me
Step on my head when I am drowning - Wedding Crashers 01:50
Step on my head when I am drowning
She's all yours - Wedding Crashers 00:15
She's all yours
She hasn't returned your phone calls - Wedding Crashers 01:14
She hasn't returned your phone calls
Never Leave a Fellow Crasher Behind - Wedding Crashers 00:14
Never Leave a Fellow Crasher Behind
Maybe go out and meet some Latin guy that can dance - Wedding Crashers 01:52
Maybe go out and meet some Latin guy that can dance
Know what we're gonna do - Wedding Crashers 01:21
Know what we're gonna do
Just a couple of kids who like to fuck - Wedding Crashers 00:20
Just a couple of kids who like to fuck

Cast

John Beckwith - Owen Wilson
Jeremy Grey - Vince Vaughn
Secretary Cleary - Christopher Walken
Claire Cleary - Rachel McAdams
Gloria Cleary - Isla Fisher
Kathleen Cleary - Jane Seymour
Grandma Mary Cleary - Ellen Albertini Dow
Todd Cleary - Keir O'Donnell
Sack Lodge - Bradley Cooper
Randolph - Ron Canada
Father O'Neil - Henry Gibson
Mr. Kroeger - Dwight Yoakam
Mrs. Kroeger - Rebecca De Mornay
Christina Cleary - Jennifer Alden
Craig - Geoff Stults
Attorney - James McDonnell
Attorney - Jesse Henecke
Old Jewish Man - Lou Cutell
Old Jewish Woman - Sparkle
Old Italian Man - Frank Ray Perilli
Old Italian Woman - Patricia Place
Old Chinese Man - Chao Li Chi
Old Irish Woman - Norma Michaels
Old Indian Man (as Noel Desouza) - Noel De Souza
Ivana (as Ivana Bozilovic) - Ivana Firestone
Brunette - Rachel Sterling
Vivian - Diora Baird
Frank Meyers - Ned Schmidtke
Bratty Kid - Dylan James Turner
Flower Girl - Sophia Blouin
Franklin - Stephen J. Downs
Secret Service Agent - Mark Duane Anderson
Elderly Woman - Irene Roseen
Rabbi - Jules Mandel
Betty - Betsy Ames
Kip (as Josh Wheeler) - Joshua Wheeler
Chazz's Mom - Kathryn Joosten
Chazz's Girlfriend - Karen Miller
Woman at Jewish Reception - Tanaya Nicole
Hindu Woman - Naureen Zaim
Girl at Irish Wedding (as Cindy Elizabeth Taylor) - Cindy Taylor
Girl Who Cries - Melanie Hawkins
Girl Who Cries - Summer Altice
Wedding Planner - Lisa Beach
Wedding Planner (as Lovelynn Ann Vanderhorst Jensen) - Lovelynn Vanderhorst
Woman at Table - Phyllis Samhaber
Man at Table - O.J. Watson
Helicopter Pilot (as Al Cerullo Jr.) - Al Cerullo
Indian Bridesmaid - Rita Rani Ahuja
Assistant US Secretary Of The Treasury - Tex Allen
Wedding Guest - Mark Atkinson
Tablecloth Trick Victim - Shawn Barber
Wedding Guest - Claudia Barroso
Crying Man at Funeral - Mike Bellesfield
Italian Wedding Swing Dancer - Jed Bernard
Cleary Wedding Guest - Beau Bowden
Bride in Montage - Jenna Burgland
Drunk Wedding Guest - Steve Carson
James Carville - James Carville
Wedding Guest - Robert Randolph Caton
Little Blonde Girl - Tiffany Collins
Wedding Guest - Adam Cooley
Groomsman #5 - Brandon Cox
Jewish Wedding Guest - Kelly De Sarla
Italian Wedding Guest - Marc De'Antone
Irish Maid of Honor - Jewel Donohue
Wedding Guest - Jonn Faircrest
Chazz Reinhold - Will Ferrell
Jewish Groom - Jeff Fields
Dr. Finkelstein - Adrian Finkelstein
Restaurant Patron - Pamela Fischer
Girl's Father - Gill Garci
Old Man at Italian Wedding - Tony Giammattei
Jewish Groomsman - Jason Aaron Goldberg
Italian Wedding Salsa Dancer - Ina Haybaeck-Rogers
Wedding Guest - James A. Howard
Indian Bridesmaid - Roopashree Jeevaji
Indian Bridesmaid - Z.M. Nan Khan
Irish Waiter - Joe Koons
Funeral Mourner - Brian T. Lynch
Organist at Wedding - Rick Lyon
Photographer - Robert Neal Marshall
Bridesmaid - Amber Matthews
John McCain - John McCain
Hot Girl - Betsy McIntyre
Guest at Wedding Reception - Michael McKennitt
Wedding Guest - Mike Monroe
Wedding Reception Guest - Deanna Mustard
Italian Groom - Brad Newman
Magic Kid - Jacob Newman
Boxing Attendee - Joseph Oliveira
Bridesmaid - Laura Orrico
Indian Groomsman - Neil Patil
Sexy Wedding Guest - Libby Pedersen
Italian Wedding Guest - Paola Perla
Crying Woman - Carolyn Robertson
Bouquet Catcher - Rhonda Roscoe
Woman in Hat - Lindsay Schoneweis
Wedding Guest - McKenzie Shea
Cleary House Servant - William F. Smith
Wedding Guest - Jim Templar
Cleary House Servant - John H. Tobin
Jewish Wedding Guest - Holly Traister
Wedding Guest - Ray Trickitt
Wedding Guest - Debbie Tsamoudakis
Bridesmaid - Juting Tsang
Secret Service Agent - Schuster Vance
Indian Groom - Dipendra Vasistha
Bridesmaid - Kelsey Wedeen
Italian Bride - Michelle Woods
Sexy Wedding Guest - Brigitte Wulf