"Withnail & I" quotes

Withnail & I poster

In 1969, two substance-abusing, unemployed actors retreat to the countryside for a holiday that proves disastrous.

Director: Bruce Robinson

Writer: Bruce Robinson

Production: N/A

Genre: comedy, drama

Year: 1987

MetaScore: 84/100

ImdbRating: 7.6

BoxOffice: $1,544,889

Released: 19 Jun 1987

Awards: 1 win & 1 nomination

138 Clips

Surrounded by trees and nature - Withnail & I

Surrounded by trees and nature

Marwood off Danny's here - Withnail & I

Marwood off Danny's here

Have either of you got shoes - Withnail & I

Have either of you got shoes

Trade Phenodihydrochloride benzorex - Withnail & I

Trade Phenodihydrochloride benzorex

This doll is extremely dangerous - Withnail & I

This doll is extremely dangerous

I'm not having this shag sack insulting me - Withnail & I

I'm not having this shag sack insulting me

I brought two of these in case you were good in the kitchen - Withnail & I

I brought two of these in case you were good in the kitchen

I think you've been punished enough - Withnail & I

I think you've been punished enough

Where is he I'm utterly arseholed - Withnail & I

Where is he I'm utterly arseholed

Monty Uh what on earth are those - Withnail & I

Monty Uh what on earth are those

Which of you is going to be a splendid fellow - Withnail & I

Which of you is going to be a splendid fellow

I've already put a two shilling piece in - Withnail & I

I've already put a two shilling piece in

What are you doing - Withnail & I

What are you doing

You mustn't blame him You mustn't blame yourself - Withnail & I

You mustn't blame him You mustn't blame yourself

Where did you school - Withnail & I

Where did you school

These have been fed from asshole to beak - Withnail & I

These have been fed from asshole to beak

Listen Withnail It's a stinker why don't you go back - Withnail & I

Listen Withnail It's a stinker why don't you go back

Couldn't I'm spaced - Withnail & I

Couldn't I'm spaced

Aren't you getting absurdly high - Withnail & I

Aren't you getting absurdly high

Marwood Gimme a downer Danny My brain's capsizing I've - Withnail & I

Marwood Gimme a downer Danny My brain's capsizing I've

September it's a bad patch - Withnail & I

September it's a bad patch

I know you're not asleep boy - Withnail & I

I know you're not asleep boy

Off you go then I'll sleep here - Withnail & I

Off you go then I'll sleep here

Are you a sponge or a stone - Withnail & I

Are you a sponge or a stone

Wake up you bastard Or I'll burn this bastard bed down - Withnail & I

Wake up you bastard Or I'll burn this bastard bed down

Look at us Nothing that reasonable members of society - Withnail & I

Look at us Nothing that reasonable members of society

Why don't you ask your father How can it be so cold in here - Withnail & I

Why don't you ask your father How can it be so cold in here

Chin chin - Withnail & I

Look at my tongue - Withnail & I

Look at my tongue

I'm in the middle of a bloody overdose - Withnail & I

I'm in the middle of a bloody overdose

Marwood off 13 million Londoners have to wake up to this - Withnail & I

Marwood off 13 million Londoners have to wake up to this

Don't threaten me with a dead fish - Withnail & I

Don't threaten me with a dead fish

Who is the huge spade in the bath - Withnail & I

Who is the huge spade in the bath

Danny You have done something to your brain - Withnail & I

Danny You have done something to your brain

Gimme a Valium I'm getting the fear - Withnail & I

Gimme a Valium I'm getting the fear

Where is he - Withnail & I

A bit early in the morning for festivities isn't it - Withnail & I

A bit early in the morning for festivities isn't it

Big man Perfumed ponce - Withnail & I

Big man Perfumed ponce

Withnail Fancy that silage heap hanging around up here - Withnail & I

Withnail Fancy that silage heap hanging around up here

Do you realise this gaff's over run with rodents - Withnail & I

Do you realise this gaff's over run with rodents

There can be no true beauty without decay - Withnail & I

There can be no true beauty without decay

Bastard asked me to understudy Constantine in the Sea Gull - Withnail & I

Bastard asked me to understudy Constantine in the Sea Gull

Panting My thumbs have gone weird - Withnail & I

Panting My thumbs have gone weird

We're bona fide We're not from London - Withnail & I

We're bona fide We're not from London

Danny You're looking very beautiful man - Withnail & I

Danny You're looking very beautiful man

Law rather appeals to me actually - Withnail & I

Law rather appeals to me actually

I had to come I tried not to - Withnail & I

I had to come I tried not to

Hm The carrot has mystery - Withnail & I

Hm The carrot has mystery

What do you want - Withnail & I

What do you want

Get that damned swine out of here - Withnail & I

Get that damned swine out of here

How dare you How dare you - Withnail & I

How dare you How dare you

Have you been at the controls - Withnail & I

Have you been at the controls

Listen I know what you're thinking but I had no alternative - Withnail & I

Listen I know what you're thinking but I had no alternative

Come on lads let's get home The sky's beginning to bruise - Withnail & I

Come on lads let's get home The sky's beginning to bruise

Excuse me - Withnail & I

I might fetch you up a rabbit - Withnail & I

I might fetch you up a rabbit

I might come and see you lads in the week - Withnail & I

I might come and see you lads in the week

VVegetables again We'll sprout fucking feelers soon - Withnail & I

VVegetables again We'll sprout fucking feelers soon

I think a drink don't you - Withnail & I

I think a drink don't you

The old order changeth - Withnail & I

The old order changeth

A coward you are and expert on bulls you are not - Withnail & I

A coward you are and expert on bulls you are not

And have another look in that shed Find anything - Withnail & I

And have another look in that shed Find anything

Danny Where exactly have you two been - Withnail & I

Danny Where exactly have you two been

Here comes another fucker - Withnail & I

Here comes another fucker

How dare you tell him I'm a toilet trader - Withnail & I

How dare you tell him I'm a toilet trader

You shouldn't treat each other so badly - Withnail & I

You shouldn't treat each other so badly

Monty Laisse moi respirer - Withnail & I

Monty Laisse moi respirer

I'm preparing myself to forgive you - Withnail & I

I'm preparing myself to forgive you

It's all your fault - Withnail & I

It's all your fault

What happened to your leg - Withnail & I

What happened to your leg

Monty indeed I remember my first agent - Withnail & I

Monty indeed I remember my first agent

Don't vent spleen on me I'm in the same boat - Withnail & I

Don't vent spleen on me I'm in the same boat

No Phone - Withnail & I

You know what we should do - Withnail & I

You know what we should do

You can stuff it up your arse for nothing - Withnail & I

You can stuff it up your arse for nothing

I'll say one thing for Monty - Withnail & I

I'll say one thing for Monty

Withnail There must and shall be aspirin - Withnail & I

Withnail There must and shall be aspirin

What happened to your cigar commercial - Withnail & I

What happened to your cigar commercial

Jesus you're covered in shit - Withnail & I

Jesus you're covered in shit

Get your kit together We're leaving in half an hour - Withnail & I

Get your kit together We're leaving in half an hour

I can never touch meat until it's cooked - Withnail & I

I can never touch meat until it's cooked

Withnail At some point or another I wanna stop and get hold - Withnail & I

Withnail At some point or another I wanna stop and get hold

I got a bastard behind the eyes - Withnail & I

I got a bastard behind the eyes

Marwood Gimme a downer Danny My brain's capsizing I've - Withnail & I

Marwood Gimme a downer Danny My brain's capsizing I've

What's going on - Withnail & I

What's going on

Here hare here - Withnail & I

Poor old bastard - Withnail & I

Poor old bastard

We want them here and we want them now - Withnail & I

We want them here and we want them now

With this far out looking hat - Withnail & I

With this far out looking hat

What are we supposed to do with that - Withnail & I

What are we supposed to do with that

Look here my cousin's a Q C - Withnail & I

Look here my cousin's a Q C

I think we've been in here too long - Withnail & I

I think we've been in here too long

Listen I pay you 10 percent to do that - Withnail & I

Listen I pay you 10 percent to do that

Monty Beastly little parasite - Withnail & I

Monty Beastly little parasite

Has he just been busted - Withnail & I

Has he just been busted

Jesus look at that - Withnail & I

Jesus look at that

I'm a trained actor reduced to the state of a bum - Withnail & I

I'm a trained actor reduced to the state of a bum

How come Monty owns such a horrible little shack - Withnail & I

How come Monty owns such a horrible little shack

Bastards - Withnail & I

Withnail I've some extremely distressing news - Withnail & I

Withnail I've some extremely distressing news

Oh Christ Almighty - Withnail & I

Oh Christ Almighty

It's true I crept the boards in my youth - Withnail & I

It's true I crept the boards in my youth

You're not leaving me in here alone - Withnail & I

You're not leaving me in here alone

Tell him if you must I no longer care - Withnail & I

Tell him if you must I no longer care

What is it What have you found - Withnail & I

What is it What have you found

Have you got some soup - Withnail & I

Have you got some soup

I recommend you smoke some more grass - Withnail & I

I recommend you smoke some more grass

Scrubbers - Withnail & I

This is ridiculous - Withnail & I

This is ridiculous

Right Now we're going to have to approach this scientifically - Withnail & I

Right Now we're going to have to approach this...

Grab its ring Keep your bag up - Withnail & I

Grab its ring Keep your bag up

I've just narrowly avoided having a buggering - Withnail & I

I've just narrowly avoided having a buggering

Listen to this Curse of the Supermen - Withnail & I

Listen to this Curse of the Supermen

This place is uninhabitable - Withnail & I

This place is uninhabitable

Marwood trembling off I could hardly piss straight with fear - Withnail & I

Marwood trembling off I could hardly piss straight with fear

I wouldn't drink that if I were you - Withnail & I

I wouldn't drink that if I were you

Marwood off Speed is like a dozen transatlantic flights without - Withnail & I

Marwood off Speed is like a dozen transatlantic flights...

If my father was loaded I'd ask him for some money - Withnail & I

If my father was loaded I'd ask him for some money

Yeah my partner's got a really good idea for making dolls - Withnail & I

Yeah my partner's got a really good idea for making dolls

Oh look at this little bastard - Withnail & I

Oh look at this little bastard

What about him - Withnail & I

Time gents please - Withnail & I

Time gents please

Do you like vegetables - Withnail & I

Do you like vegetables

The joint I'm about to roll requires a craftsman - Withnail & I

The joint I'm about to roll requires a craftsman

There's one over there that doesn't like the perfume The big one - Withnail & I

There's one over there that doesn't like the perfume The big...

Don't get uptight with me - Withnail & I

Don't get uptight with me

Marwood off Even a stopped clock gives the right time - Withnail & I

Marwood off Even a stopped clock gives the right time

He's going into your room - Withnail & I

He's going into your room

I must have some booze - Withnail & I

I must have some booze

Withnail Look at that Look at that - Withnail & I

Withnail Look at that Look at that

All right This is the plan - Withnail & I

All right This is the plan

I don't advise a haircut man - Withnail & I

I don't advise a haircut man

I have of late but wherefore I know not - Withnail & I

I have of late but wherefore I know not

Right you fucker I'm gonna do the washing up - Withnail & I

Right you fucker I'm gonna do the washing up

Balls We want the finest wines available to humanity - Withnail & I

Balls We want the finest wines available to humanity

I mean free to those that can afford it and very expensive to those who can't - Withnail & I

I mean free to those that can afford it and very expensive...

How should I know I feel like a pig shat on my head - Withnail & I

How should I know I feel like a pig shat on my head

Withnail Are you the farmer - Withnail & I

Withnail Are you the farmer

Cast

Withnail - Richard E. Grant

... & I - Paul McGann

Monty - Richard Griffiths

Danny - Ralph Brown

Jake - Michael Elphick

Irishman - Daragh O'Malley

Isaac Parkin - Michael Wardle

Mrs. Parkin - Una Brandon-Jones

Raymond (General) - Noel Johnson

Mabs Blenehassit (Waitress) - Irene Sutcliffe

Tea Shop Proprietor - Llewellyn Rees

Policeman 1 - Robert Oates

Policeman 2 - Anthony Wise

Presuming Ed - Eddie Tagoe

Lady in Tea Room - Joyce Everson

Lady in Tea Room - Alecia St Leger

Man In Cafe - Fred Wood