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I've never dropped a baby, but when Sara was three months
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You Keep the Kids

I've never dropped a baby,but when Sara was three months I whacked her head on a...

I've never dropped a baby,
but when Sara was three months I whacked her head on a doorway
and she cried for three hours

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.237
I've never dropped a baby, but when Sara was three months
00:00:04.304 --> 00:00:07.044
I whacked her head on a doorway and she cried for three hours.
Duration
7 seconds
Views
21
Timestamp in Movie
00:43:26
Uploaded
May 19, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Follows separating couple Flora and Victor who launch a bitter battle to not keep custody of their three children.
Accept it, your maternal instinct stops you from being mean. - You Keep the Kids 00:05
Accept it, your maternal instinct stops you from being mean.
- I won. - Good morning. - You Keep the Kids 00:05
- I won. - Good morning.
When Mom goes, who do you think will do the housework? - You Keep the Kids 00:05
When Mom goes, who do you think will do the housework?
Don't raise your voice at me! I'm your father! - You Keep the Kids 00:04
Don't raise your voice at me! I'm your father!
And while you live under my roof... - You Keep the Kids 00:04
And while you live under my roof...
This isn't hotel, - You Keep the Kids 00:06
This isn't hotel,
The gravy train is over for you, it's over. - You Keep the Kids 00:04
The gravy train is over for you, it's over.
Guys, today we're doing activities with Dad. - You Keep the Kids 00:04
Guys, today we're doing activities with Dad.
I don't know if this is romantic or stupid. - You Keep the Kids 00:04
I don't know if this is romantic or stupid.
I thought about dislocating my shoulder to see you, but... - You Keep the Kids 00:05
I thought about dislocating my shoulder to see you, but...
I actually just wanted to give you this. Merry Christmas. - You Keep the Kids 00:05
I actually just wanted to give you this. Merry Christmas.
At under two yards, it hurts. Under one yard, it really hurts. - You Keep the Kids 00:05
At under two yards, it hurts. Under one yard, it really hurt...
Well, parents against kids, - You Keep the Kids 00:06
Well, parents against kids,
I wanted to do something cultural. - You Keep the Kids 00:05
I wanted to do something cultural.
Before you know it, your life is: - You Keep the Kids 00:10
Before you know it, your life is:
Shall we talk about Victor's "minor"? You asked me about Claudia. - You Keep the Kids 00:05
Shall we talk about Victor's "minor"? You ask...
And my kids will adore her and called her "young mommy". - You Keep the Kids 00:04
And my kids will adore her and called her "young mommy&...
Give the older one some drugs, let the middle on play Fortnite, - You Keep the Kids 00:07
Give the older one some drugs, let the middle on play Fortni...
And the girl is so pretty, she's super pretty. - You Keep the Kids 00:05
And the girl is so pretty, she's super pretty.
She's got a face like this, - You Keep the Kids 00:06
She's got a face like this,