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Bite Me

When Sarah, a real-life vampire, gets audited, the last thing she expects is a date. But an unlikely spark with IRS agent, James, forces two misfits to confront whether they have the courage to commit the radical act of falling in...

Director

Meredith Edwards

Year

Genre

comedy, romance

Box Office

N/A

Production

N/A

Awards

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Cast information not available.

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Explore 221 Clips

All of a sudden, - Bite Me

All of a sudden,

Lily's boyfriend
broke up with her - Bite Me

Lily's boyfriend broke up with her

Someone sent him
that stupid clip - Bite Me

Someone sent him that stupid clip

And I said I can, I am. - Bite Me

And I said I can, I am.

And he said well I can't
and he told me to go. - Bite Me

And he said well I can't and he told me to go.

Oh, and that's why
we don't date mundanes. - Bite Me

Oh, and that's why we don't date mundanes.

They'll break your heart,
but you can have sex with them. - Bite Me

They'll break your heart, but you can have sex with the...

"Lord Stacz and Mistress Regan - Bite Me

"Lord Stacz and Mistress Regan

You can't just make
a viral video, - Bite Me

You can't just make a viral video,

You're gonna go on the internet - Bite Me

You're gonna go on the internet

I just don't think
everyone in the whole world - Bite Me

I just don't think everyone in the whole world

I want people to see me! - Bite Me

I want people to see me!

And you think people are
gonna take you seriously? - Bite Me

And you think people are gonna take you seriously?

We should just keep
subverting who we are, - Bite Me

We should just keep subverting who we are,

I told you three weeks ago - Bite Me

I told you three weeks ago

But when Todd left me
after 35 years, - Bite Me

But when Todd left me after 35 years,

I don't expect you
to understand this, - Bite Me

I don't expect you to understand this,

And you call and call
and call and he doesn't pick up. - Bite Me

And you call and call and call and he doesn't pick up.

You know, we had such
great times together at Oxford. - Bite Me

You know, we had such great times together at Oxford.

- She's great, just so great.
- Yeah. - Bite Me

- She's great, just so great. - Yeah.

Most of the time working
at the IRS - Bite Me

Most of the time working at the IRS

You work hard all the time, - Bite Me

You work hard all the time,

And then a small spotlight
might be shown - Bite Me

And then a small spotlight might be shown

This year you filed as single - Bite Me

This year you filed as single

Genealogists hire me
to find the graves - Bite Me

Genealogists hire me to find the graves

I take pictures,
write down information, - Bite Me

I take pictures, write down information,

This lists you
as the primary director - Bite Me

This lists you as the primary director

We're not supernatural,
obviously, - Bite Me

We're not supernatural, obviously,

You know,
I'm feeling like you may not - Bite Me

You know, I'm feeling like you may not

Do you think I could maybe
get another IRS agent - Bite Me

Do you think I could maybe get another IRS agent

You filed your taxes
as a registered church - Bite Me

You filed your taxes as a registered church

I printed up a list of a lot - Bite Me

I printed up a list of a lot

This is America, I'm not sure
if you're familiar with America. - Bite Me

This is America, I'm not sure if you're familiar w...

Look, James Thayer,
I just, I don't understand - Bite Me

Look, James Thayer, I just, I don't understand

Apparently there's been
some heightened media attention - Bite Me

Apparently there's been some heightened media attention

After an initial review
of your organization, - Bite Me

After an initial review of your organization,

Unless the documents
that you bring today - Bite Me

Unless the documents that you bring today

You will owe back taxes
for the past eight years, - Bite Me

You will owe back taxes for the past eight years,

It's a job, I enjoy myself
on evenings and weekends. - Bite Me

It's a job, I enjoy myself on evenings and weekends.

So, even the man hates the man. - Bite Me

So, even the man hates the man.

Don't you think
it's kind of obvious - Bite Me

Don't you think it's kind of obvious

Hey, I'm really sorry, my day's
just kind of a disaster. - Bite Me

Hey, I'm really sorry, my day's just kind of a dis...

I'd say that that was - Bite Me

I'd say that that was

And I'm very competent
at my job, - Bite Me

And I'm very competent at my job,

I didn't understand
half the forms I just turned in - Bite Me

I didn't understand half the forms I just turned in

And you think I'm a joke,
so it seems to me - Bite Me

And you think I'm a joke, so it seems to me

So I'm gonna end up homeless
or in jail, - Bite Me

So I'm gonna end up homeless or in jail,

But you're a bigot, - Bite Me

But you're a bigot,

I will give it
a more in depth review, - Bite Me

I will give it a more in depth review,

Paperwork, religious documents,
press clippings, - Bite Me

Paperwork, religious documents, press clippings,

This is my personal cell phone. - Bite Me

This is my personal cell phone.

Call me on this,
do not call me at the office. - Bite Me

Call me on this, do not call me at the office.

Meet me at a bar or something,
anything not here. - Bite Me

Meet me at a bar or something, anything not here.

You know, - Bite Me

There's just two people
they'd give his job to. - Bite Me

There's just two people they'd give his job to.

That I'm a vampire is
a physical fact, yes, - Bite Me

That I'm a vampire is a physical fact, yes,

I'm sorry that I missed you, - Bite Me

I'm sorry that I missed you,

I was on a date, actually. - Bite Me

I was on a date, actually.

Sample donor contracts,
rules about blood tests. - Bite Me

Sample donor contracts, rules about blood tests.

I printed out the vampire codex - Bite Me

I printed out the vampire codex

Okay, so,
we have a biological condition - Bite Me

Okay, so, we have a biological condition

So we have to supplement
our own energy - Bite Me

So we have to supplement our own energy

That's nice, maybe later I could
take pot shots at your beliefs. - Bite Me

That's nice, maybe later I could take pot shots at your...

I mean, I am, obviously,
an IRS agent, - Bite Me

I mean, I am, obviously, an IRS agent,

It doesn't make any sense to me, - Bite Me

It doesn't make any sense to me,

I mean, I'm just gonna reopen
the case for review, - Bite Me

I mean, I'm just gonna reopen the case for review,

I just think
that it would be good - Bite Me

I just think that it would be good

Right, yeah,
it's just it's my first church. - Bite Me

Right, yeah, it's just it's my first church.

Hey, I don't know if you
saw the Facebook invite, - Bite Me

Hey, I don't know if you saw the Facebook invite,

Pam and I would be happy
to come pick you up - Bite Me

Pam and I would be happy to come pick you up

I became obsessed. - Bite Me

I became obsessed.

Stare at the blood. - Bite Me

Stare at the blood.

Are they just waiting
by their computers - Bite Me

Are they just waiting by their computers

He kept telling people
we sleep in coffins. - Bite Me

He kept telling people we sleep in coffins.

He wants to know what vampires
are like for the case. - Bite Me

He wants to know what vampires are like for the case.

It's the governing body of all
the vampire houses in the city. - Bite Me

It's the governing body of all the vampire houses in th...

We broke off eight years ago - Bite Me

We broke off eight years ago

Whoa, that's that
vampire chick from YouTube. - Bite Me

Whoa, that's that vampire chick from YouTube.

Ayo, vampire lady, you wanna
come sleep in my coffin? - Bite Me

Ayo, vampire lady, you wanna come sleep in my coffin?

Only 103 people saw that video, - Bite Me

Only 103 people saw that video,

Mistress Christine Berman. - Bite Me

Mistress Christine Berman.

Former elder
of the Court of Dreams. - Bite Me

Former elder of the Court of Dreams.

Former bride
of the King of Kings - Bite Me

Former bride of the King of Kings

Ugh! Did I mention there's
no alcohol at these things? - Bite Me

Ugh! Did I mention there's no alcohol at these things?

It is a surprise
to see you once more - Bite Me

It is a surprise to see you once more

This is James,
he's our black swan. - Bite Me

This is James, he's our black swan.

The elders are not happy - Bite Me

The elders are not happy

I am the approved media contact
for this community. - Bite Me

I am the approved media contact for this community.

She... just suffocates me. - Bite Me

She... just suffocates me.

You know, I believe
in a sensual approach to life. - Bite Me

You know, I believe in a sensual approach to life.

Bite Me poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

When Sarah, a real-life vampire, gets audited, the last thing she expects is a date. But an unlikely spark with IRS agent, James, forces two misfits to confront whether they have the courage to commit the radical act of falling in...

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Meredith Edwards

Writer: Naomi McDougall Jones

Production: N/A

Genre: comedy, romance

Year: 2019

MetaScore: N/A/100

ImdbRating: 5.6

BoxOffice: N/A

Released: 08 Feb 2022

Awards: N/A

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