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Free Bert

A gloriously messy dad and his equally unfiltered family cause chaos when they try to fit in with the snobby crowd at their elite new school.

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Explore 59 Clips

Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday, dear Rob Happy birthday to you - Free Bert

Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday,...

This guy's got a small dick. - Free Bert

This guy's got a small dick.

…we're getting fucked in the ass right now! - Free Bert

…we're getting fucked in the ass right now!

Uh, thank you, guys, so much for celebrating me tonight. - Free Bert

Uh, thank you, guys, so much for celebrating me tonight.

So, Mrs. - Free Bert

Rob Lowe, everybody. - Free Bert

Rob Lowe, everybody.

Thank you, thank you. - Free Bert

Thank you, thank you.

Do it again. - Free Bert

Yeah? Rip that shirt, baby. Rip that fucking sh-- Rip it. Take it off! Take it off! Take it off! Tak - Free Bert

Yeah? Rip that shirt, baby. Rip that fucking sh-- Rip it....

Maybe I could try to beat it. - Free Bert

Maybe I could try to beat it.

Wait. It just hit me. And it pains me to say this out loud. Fucking… Mayumi. Oh. She must've heard m - Free Bert

Wait. It just hit me. And it pains me to say this out loud....

Hey. You are beautiful. Do you hear me? You can't let 'em change you. You can't let any of these mot - Free Bert

Hey. You are beautiful. Do you hear me? You can't let...

-Okay. -Great. -Awesome. -Welcome to our home. - Free Bert

-Okay. -Great. -Awesome. -Welcome to our home.

You have an opening joke? - Free Bert

You have an opening joke?

Yeah, Kiersten. - Free Bert

Yeah, Kiersten.

Big weekend. - Free Bert

Mmm. Wow. This is your closet? Just for my purses and shoes. Could you imagine if this was it? So gr - Free Bert

Mmm. Wow. This is your closet? Just for my purses and shoes....

Sweetie, would you do me a favor? - Free Bert

Sweetie, would you do me a favor?

Oh. I'm a little concerned about Bert. - Free Bert

Oh. I'm a little concerned about Bert.

What's going on with her? - Free Bert

What's going on with her?

Simple fucking orchiopexy, but you had to get high out of your fucking skull! - Free Bert

Simple fucking orchiopexy, but you had to get high out of...

So, how's it going with Zac? - Free Bert

So, how's it going with Zac?

What the fuck am I doing? - Free Bert

What the fuck am I doing?

No, uh, we-- we did. - Free Bert

No, uh, we-- we did.

This is ridiculous. - Free Bert

This is ridiculous.

Hi, Carl! - Free Bert

Gene Magnussen, but, uh… He's no longer with us. - Free Bert

Gene Magnussen, but, uh… He's no longer with us.

Ladies and gentlemen, your headmaster, Miriam Rossmyre. - Free Bert

Ladies and gentlemen, your headmaster, Miriam Rossmyre.

It's Glen. - Free Bert

Hey, what are you doing here? - Free Bert

Hey, what are you doing here?

Carl, come in. - Free Bert

Hi. Hi. Georgia, is it? Um, yeah. Kiersten Vanderthal. -This is Cameron, Lexi, and Fiona. -Hi. Some - Free Bert

Hi. Hi. Georgia, is it? Um, yeah. Kiersten Vanderthal. -This...

Thank you, Miriam. - Free Bert

Thank you, Miriam.

Who are the Suddlesons? - Free Bert

Who are the Suddlesons?

Thank you. - Free Bert

Ah! Come on in. Georgia! - Free Bert

Ah! Come on in. Georgia!

What you got going on tonight? - Free Bert

What you got going on tonight?

And now for Miss Barklidge. - Free Bert

And now for Miss Barklidge.

Have I ever told you How good it feels to hold you? - Free Bert

Have I ever told you How good it feels to hold you?

Hello, Kiersten. - Free Bert

Hello, Kiersten.

Is this related in any way to the Kiersten beat-down you took the other day? - Free Bert

Is this related in any way to the Kiersten beat-down you...

-God, no. - Free Bert

Well, I mean… Maybe it's not you, you know. - Free Bert

Well, I mean… Maybe it's not you, you know.

I mean, it says so right in the handbook. - Free Bert

I mean, it says so right in the handbook.

How's he doing? - Free Bert

How's he doing?

That's a huge fucking note, Doc. - Free Bert

That's a huge fucking note, Doc.

Oh, man. - Free Bert

Can I help you? - Free Bert

Can I help you?

I… I want to find out who's behind this. - Free Bert

I… I want to find out who's behind this.

Thank you so much. - Free Bert

Thank you so much.

Kiersten Vanderthal. - Free Bert

Kiersten Vanderthal.

Zac's having surgery… -Oh. - Free Bert

Zac's having surgery… -Oh.

What did I tell you? - Free Bert

What did I tell you?

-Well, well, well. - Free Bert

-Well, well, well.

Miriam, you may be able to silence me, but you'll never silence all of us. - Free Bert

Miriam, you may be able to silence me, but you'll never...

-Okay, okay! - Free Bert

Same fucking stripper. - Free Bert

Same fucking stripper.

Shorty always here Trying to prove something Shorty got some back on her back Shorty got some back on her back Shorty got some back on her back She gon' break her back for the racks I'm so fucking wasted. - Free Bert

Shorty always here Trying to prove something Shorty got some...

Holy shit! - Free Bert

Free Bert poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

A gloriously messy dad and his equally unfiltered family cause chaos when they try to fit in with the snobby crowd at their elite new school.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: N/A

Writer: N/A

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Genre: Comedy

Year: 2026

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